Our Long and Winding Journey…or shall I say “Crusade”

I know… it has been a while!! I have been procrastinating posting in hopes of some good news to share, but finally decided today to sit down and update everyone on what is going on with our adoption and also about my trip to Ethiopia in May. I’ll start with the “nothing major to report” and end with the amazing-seeing the kids again! Just a warning-this is a LONG post-I’m making up for the past 2 months!

We have officially decided to change “Our Journey” to “Our Crusade” because that is sure what it feels like! After 20 months of waiting, we are still waiting on specific paperwork on guardianship for our children-crazy, huh?. When I went to Ethiopia at the end of May and spoke with the lawyer for our agency she shared that we would get through court this summer and we should be getting another court date within a week-we have been an open case on the court docket since our last court date in April due to some paperwork that was needed. We waited and waited and didn’t hear anything. After many calls and e-mails, we received an e-mail from our agency director a few weeks ago stating that we weren’t going to get through court this summer due to some changed court rules and they will have an update for us in September. We spoke on the phone and he explained the challenges and what is still needed (too long to go into) and he said he is hopeful they will get what is needed for court approval, but can‘t give us a time line. Needless to say, this was devastating news to us. We felt so sure it was going to be this summer and we would finally bring our kids home. We are sad, mad, angry, frustrated, hurt…the list of emotions goes on, but there isn’t much we can do at this point, but wait, pray and hope for a miracle. Our hearts break for our kids who are waiting and hoping we will come for them soon. We feel in our hearts we will bring our kids home sooner or later and we will wait however long it takes and do whatever we have to do to bring them home.

We definitely have been through the ringer with this adoption-nothing like we thought it would be, but what really is? We laugh-we chose Ethiopia for many reasons-love the culture, always had a deep interest in Africa, etc…but also because of the short time frame to adopt and the fact that you only have to travel once when you pick up your kids. Ha-Ha….I have already traveled there twice to visit and we have waited twice as long as originally thought-never as we think it will be! BUT…we have learned so much along the way, met lots of great people and have really grown in our faith and as a couple. There definitely are some positives along the way that we are grateful for! I will blog soon about a non-for -profit charity that I am getting involved in through someone I met along the way! We believe things happen for a reason and sometimes it takes a while to get to the big picture.

I saw this funny shirt on someone’s blog and it really sums things up, but I can’t remember whose blog it was so I can‘t post a picture. Anyway, it says something like:

WARNING: I am in the process of adopting and yes I am still waiting. I am subject to cry and be cranky at any moment so bear with me until I am on the plane to Ethiopia! How true…so bear with us if we are cranky or not wanting to talk about it. We know everyone cares and is truly supportive of our adoption, and we so appreciate this, it is just not easy for us to talk about it when we have little news to share. As soon as we have some good news, believe me you will hear us screaming-even in NY!

I settled for this shirt, but it is pretty neat too!



Now for the fun stuff….my trip was absolutely amazing-better than I could have ever imagined! I traveled with another adoptive parent who got to meet her children for the same time-what a touching experience! I flew Emirates this time and went through Dubai-interesting experience and a much nicer plane! It was great to have some in-flight entertainment on my 16+ hour flight-I probably watched about 10 movies! I used the same driver-Ayele that we used on our last trip! I just love him-he is an awesome guy-funny and really takes care of you! He drove us every day and stayed with us for shopping, dining, etc… My first visit to Bethel (where the kids are) was amazing. Yordanos came running up to me saying Mommy as soon as she saw me-it was so sweet. She had the biggest smile on her face and all of the other kids were saying-Yordanos and Danny’s Mommy is here! I loved hearing that-I wish I could post the pictures, but not allowed until we pass court! Danny came up soon after and gave me a huge hug and kiss and said I love you Mommy. We spent some time together and I gave them special gifts from Mommy and Daddy-a necklace for Yordanos that says a saying about family on it and a watch for Danny. Dave made a video for them before I left and I showed the video-they were so excited to see Daddy-they wanted to see it over and over! One of my favorite pictures is the kids watching the video of Dave with huge smiles on their face-it is so cute! I also spent some alone time with the other kids who are being adopted and spoke to them about their families in America and told them how much they loved them and are waiting for them.

We gave out lots of donations to all of the kids. We had so many donations from various people so everyone got tons of stuff! Thank you to all who gave donations-it means the world to the kids. We brought a bunch of great school supplies for them too. Books, flash cards, markers, etc… I even brought a pennant from President Obama’s inauguration that one of my teacher’s gave me. They knew who president Obama was and were so excited to hang it in their school. We spent some time in the school house and the kids showed me how they could write in English. It is wonderful how much English they know-speaking, understanding and writing. My kids wrote on the black board-I am so happy-I love you Mommy and Daddy. Danny was so funny-he was intently writing on the board all of the words he knew in English (days of week, etc…) and spelling them pretty good. They are all so smart and gracious kids-it is amazing that they have so little and want for nothing. It was also great to see Mame-the caretaker at Bethel. She is such a kind and caring woman and just loves the kids. We stayed for a few hours and played with the kids, didn’t want to leave but we had to get back to Addis.

My next visit to Bethel was just with Ayele and myself-unfortunately my travel partner got sick and stayed behind. We stopped at a fruit stand and bought a ton of fruit and water and goodies to bring with us. The power goes on and off (seemed like more off than on) in Ethiopia frequently so we wanted to get them a good supply of water. The owner of the fruit stand was so kind-he invited us in for a fresh mango and pineapple fruit drink. In turn, I shared my trail mix with them-they had never had chocolate before-they loved it, but who doesn’t like chocolate! The PTO at Dave’s school donated about 50 shirts for the kids so I brought them for them and got some pictures of all of the kids with their school shirts on-it was fun! We spent some time with the kids-laughed, hugged and really got to know their personalities! Danny is hysterical-much different from our last visit. He was much more reserved last time and quiet. This time-he was climbing and running all over and wanted his picture taken -he would say-“photo Momma, photo” in his cute little accent. He was sticking out his tongue, making funny faces and giggling to be funny! He was a riot! Yordanos loves attention, but what 8 year old girl doesn’t! She loves soccer and competition-plays with the boys all the time as the goalie. She does well in school, but definitely has a preference for sports! She likes to play around and have fun! Before we left, Mame said that the Dr. wanted to meet me and to call him to set up a meeting. He is the reason why are kids are there-he created bethel for the kids so I was so excited to get the opportunity to meet him. I actually met him that day at the hospital and what a nice man he is. He really cares for the kids and wants them to be in a good home. I felt so honored to meet him and really thought about how his starting this orphanage and bringing Yordanos & Danny there has changed all of our lives. It was truly a wonderful experience to meet him.

My last visit to Bethel was an overnight visit. I was fortunate to be able to stay overnight with the kids and spend 2 days with them-can’t even put it into words how wonderful it was. Just spending so much quality time with the kids and getting to know them-all the kids, not just mine was a heartwarming experience. I got to eat with them and learn their habits, likes and dislikes. Danny hates macaroni, but likes pasta (long thin spaghetti). Yordanos is not picky at all-likes most everything. We spent time looking through photo albums that we sent them (we’ve sent 3 each) and they knew who everyone was! They even knew their cousins names and ages-it was so cool. They told me they can’t wait to meet them. We played games and listened to music-they loved my I-Pod! We made videos for Daddy and just hung out together. That evening the Dr. came to visit and spend some time with the kids with 2 other visiting Dr’s from Israel. They just loved the kids and the orphanage and it was nice getting to know them better. They played with the kids and showed them some funny tricks-we had fun!

Mame, the caretaker let us all sleep in her bed that night so we would all be together. This was so nice of her to do-what a blessing. We took some funny pictures in our pajamas and said a prayer thanking God for this time together. The kids fell asleep pretty fast, but I stayed awake most of the night just watching them.
I knew leaving the next day would be hard and it was even harder than I thought it would be. I am so grateful and blessed for the time with them, but it is so hard leaving them and not knowing when we will be back. I know they are well cared for at Bethel, but we just want them home. We said goodbye and they kept asking “when come back”? My only response was “soon, as soon as we pass court “. I tried to hold it together so they wouldn’t get upset, but we all teared up and hugged goodbye. I felt a pit in my stomach for about a day after our goodbyes and was so drained from all of the emotions.

My visits and time with the kids was truly amazing and I feel so blessed to have these memories to get us through the “wait”. Each time I get down and think how more can we possibly take-I look at photos, watch the videos and remember how amazing our kids are. They are worth all the time in the world and we will wait as long as it takes.

We did lots of other things on our trip, but it was really all about visiting with the kids-went to an Ethiopian Cultural restaurant-Fasika where they danced the night away and I got to try Ethiopian wine (strong!!), met lots of amazing people and learned so much more about Ethiopia. The more time I spend in Ethiopia, the more I love the country. Even the chanting at 2 or 6 am in the morning or the dogs barking at all hours of the night didn’t bother me much this trip. Maybe I was getting used to it, who knows. I am not sure how someone can go to Ethiopia and not be forever “changed” or “touched” by the people and culture. Sara Groves has an amazing song titled ‘I saw What I Saw” about her trip to Africa and it is so true (the you tube video is at the bottom of my blog). She says, “Something along the road has cut me to the soul, your pain has changed me, your dream inspires, your face a memory, your hope a fire, your courage asked me what I am made of, afraid of”. In another song, she sings, “It’s too heavy to carry, but impossible to leave”. So true-I guess that is why this trip has compelled me to do more in Ethiopia-beyond our adoption. Will blog more about that soon.

Hope you enjoyed hearing about my trip!! Thanks for being there with us on our “crusade“-we truly appreciate all of the support and encouragement and know it will happen eventually. Keep us-especially the kids in your prayers and we hope you hear us screaming good news soon!

Love,
Lisa & Dave

Update

It's been a while since I posted and I have lots to share. No new major info on our case, except that they are gathering the needed paperwork and waiting on a new court date. We don't expect our 4th court date to be too far out-one of the families whose kids are at our kids orphanage did not pass a week or so before us and they just got a date of June 5th. Hoping to hear soon when ours will be. There has been lots going on in the courts in Ethiopia. At this time (started about 2 or so weeks ago), the government has temporarily halted hearing cases of abandoned children due to some possible fraudulent cases. They are currently investigating a few cases, but expect to start hearing abandoned cases again in a few weeks. This does not involve our agency, and this is actually a good thing. They really do need to be sure everything is done properly and these children's situations are what they say they are. For once, we are not in this boat!!! Our children were relinquished rather than abandoned, so the courts are still hearing these type of cases.

Our other news...I am leaving tomorrow (really today-Saturday) for Ethiopia to visit with the kids. We have been talking about this for a while and an opportunity came up to travel with someone and we just knew it was the right thing to do. Will arrive in Ethiopia Monday morning and leave the following Monday. I am very excited to see the kids and most importantly reassure them that we are coming for them. I can't imagine what is going through their heads right now. I will be able to see them pretty often-can't wait to give them hugs and bond with them! Believe it or not-they know we are coming! One of the families was there this week and she shared the news with them! Since Dave is not going, last night we made a video of Dave talking to them and I will show it to them! Have lots of donations, hugs and love to bring. So...off to Ethiopia-will have so much to share when I return! Please keep us in your prayers for safe travels!

Lisa & Dave

Court Update

Unfortunately, we did not pass court on Tuesday. While the adoption process is so complex, this is what we have deciphered is the issue-more paperwork. The courts need more accurate information about the kids history. They want to make sure that they have been relinquished/abandoned and that any living family members are aware of their situation. We were always told that both of our children do not have any living parents, which we don't have any reason not to believe, but unfortunately, the kids were brought to Bethel with NO paperwork, which makes things tougher.

Right now, our cases have been left OPEN on the court dockets. This means that if our agency can find what the courts are asking for and it satisfies the judge- they will hear our case again and hopefully approve the adoption without having to re-assign us another court date. If within the next few days our agency can't get the information needed to the courts it is likely that we will be assigned a new court date and go from there.

Our agency director seems confident that the kids will come home to us. He has asked us to be patient and know that they are doing everything they can to make this happen. He leaves for Ethiopia next week and says dealing with our cases is a priority.

We asked if this would happen before the next court closures/rainy season (end of summer)and he said that he hopes so. He is hoping and praying that this will all be resolved soon.

We truly believe one is not given more than they can handle. For whatever reason, we have been given this challenging adoption journey. WHY? It's hard to tell right now, but we know eventually we will see the big picture. We have learned many lessons along the way, made new friends and have grown tremendously in our faith. Of course we are heartbroken we did not pass, but more important and bigger than us, we just want our kids to have a home full of love and not grow up in an orphanage. We are optimistic this will happen.

Thanks you for your support, prayers and encouragement and we will keep you posted!

Love,
Lisa & Dave

3rd Time a Charm-Hopefully!

Tomorrow is technically our 3rd court date (January 30th, April 6th and April 28th). We are hoping and praying that the 3rd time is a charm!!! It has been a long, hard, but also an enlightening 16 months of waiting. We have learned so much about ourselves and life during this time and we have also learned to have a lot of patience! We know that we will have our children soon and this will be a distant memory. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers for our court case tomorrow. We hope to be able to start a new chapter in this journey-the most exciting part-building our family!!

Love,
Lisa & Dave

Home Stretch....

It's Thursday, April 23rd...5 more days until court. Thinking positive and hoping the third time is a charm! We should know sometime Tuesday morning about our case! Last court date (which was on a Monday) we stayed home all weekend and couldn't stop thinking about it-barely slept. Well-not this one! I am leaving tomorrow with a group of my girlfriends for a fun girls weekend in Orlando! Will be back Sunday-really looking forward to it! Dave will have some "Man" time with his guy friends too...golf and whatever else guys do! Life is good...we will bring our kids home soon!

Lisa & Dave

Our Due Date!

Had to share-This is kind of funny and ironic!! The other day Dave and I were in Michaels getting something framed and after picking out the frame, matting, etc.. I asked the girl when it would be ready. She checked a few things in the computer and turned to us and said "Your due date is April 28th". We both looked at each other and smiled and said-"yes,it sure is"! It was funny-she really had no idea what we were chuckling and smiling about or how significant her comment about our due date was! So-there is it...our Due Date is April 28th-let's hope and pray this is our final date with few labor pains and we can officially say that we are the proud parents of Danny and Yordanos (and finally post some pictures)! 10 more days!

Lisa & Dave

Time Off!!

We are on spring break this week and enjoying some much needed time off! Sometimes you don't realize how much you go, go, go until you stop! It's going to be hard to get back going again on Monday!

Some good news...3 families passed court this week and 2 of them have been waiting a very long time (over a year). We are always happy to see families pass-especially when their kids have been waiting for them for so long. Our old-timers list (those in our agency who have been waiting over a year)is dwindling-just a few of us left so we hope the list will be gone by the end of the month. Less than 2 weeks until court!

I finally finished an album I have been working on. I did an album of pictures of the kids from our first referral picture (11/07) to now. Boy-have they changed and grown so much-which we are grateful they are healthy-just wish they were growing with us :(! It is amazing how many pictures we have and just to look at all their different expressions-they are so funny! These pictures will be real special when they grow up!!

Off on the boat...to RELAX!!!

Lisa & Dave

Ethiopian Connections

We spent the day in Orlando with a family that just returned from adopting their daughter in Ethiopia. Their daughter was at the same orphanage as our children so we were very excited to connect! We received letters from our kids as well as some new photos! It was so wonderful to see new pictures and just be with a family who was recently with our kids. We also met another mom, Dedra who adopted 3 sisters form Ethiopia last year. Dedra is also the founder of EthioAmerican Family Services, a non-for-profit organization with a mission to educate, empower, and enrich the lives of Ethiopian orphans and their adoptive families. Her organization supports programs in Ethiopia for orphans, provides educational programming, and cross-cultural opportunities that are vital to the development of Ethio-blended families. Their web-site is: http://www.ethioamericanfamily.org/home. They just recently opened an orphanage outside of Addis! We hope to be able to visit their orphanage when we travel to pick up our kids! We really enjoyed visiting with both of these families and hope to continue our connections!

Happy Easter and god bless

Lisa & Dave

Our Journey Continues

Well...it certainly wasn't the court news we expected or hoped for yesterday. No recommendations were made from MOWA so our court date was moved to the 28th of April. Basically, our case (or any of the other cases) was not heard and has been rescheduled. Maybe because of the power outages going on in Ethiopia-we are not really sure. After the crazy range of emotions we experiences yesterday - anger, frustrations, sadness (you name it-we experienced it) we toasted to the 28th and the fact that it is not too far away. International adoption is so unpredictable and we are just so blessed to even be adopting our kids. We will bring them home soon-just not in the time frame we were hoping and praying for. Soon...

A friend of mine (Thanks Jackie!!) sent me this poem-it's a tear jerker-but so special. Hopefully we will not be "blowing kisses in the wind" much longer.


KISSES IN THE WIND (The Waiting Child's Lullabye)

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...
Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.
But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.

© Pamela Durkota, written for Josh

Keep us in your prayers for the 28th.

Love,
Lisa & Dave

1 More Day!!

Tomorrow is our big day-Court! It is also my nephew's birthday and holy week so we have lots going for us!! This morning I went out to let the dogs out and in our backyard was 4 little bunnies-thought that was kind of special! I feel like we have been waiting for this day forever-well about 16 months! Believe it or not-we are pretty calm, just anxious to move forward and bring our kids home. Ethiopia is 7 hours ahead of us so we hope to hear news early on Monday. Most people hear pretty early-at least before 12:00 noon. One of the families who passed in the last 2 weeks told me she got a phone call at 6 AM!! Not sure if we will be able to sleep tonight listening for the phone or stalking e-mail!

Please keep us in your prayers and thoughts for a successful court date for Daniel and Yordanos!

Lisa & Dave

A Glimmer of Hope and so much more...

I was looking at a few blogs of fellow Hopesters (Thanks Sandee...) and found this You Tube video...Glimmer of Hope! Thought it was fitting for our situation with our court date coming up on Monday, April 6th. We do have a Glimmer of Hope (and much more...) about passing on Monday and finally bringing our kids home in May!

This is a very touching and real video about the plight that people in Africa face daily. The Glimmer of Hope Foundation seeks to make a sustainable difference in the lives of people living in poverty, specifically Ethiopians. There are so many resources that we often take for granted-see how the simplest of resources- "Fresh, Clean Water" makes a difference in the lives of thousands! Check out the video and their website: http://www.aglimmerofhope.org/

The Countdown...11 Days

Well...11 days and counting down! We almost don't want to bring attention to our court date just because of bad karma, but we are feeling very positive about April 6th. Good news from our agency this week-3 Old-Timer Hope Families passed court this week! Huge celebration-we are called Old-Timers because there is a small group of us who have been waiting a minimum of a year and many even longer. We are so excited that they passed and will be getting their kids soon! We plan to be in that mode in just 11 days!! There are so many ups and downs in adoption, and we all know this going into it, but the emotional toll is still very hard. It will all be worth it in the end!

One of the families from Hope will be going to pick up their little girl from Bethel (where our kids are) this weekend. While the kids have such wonderful care there, we are so excited for the first child to leave Bethel and be with their forever family! I am sure this will be emotional since the kids have been together for a long time. We sent some pictures and a letter for the family to share with Danny and Yordanos! Can't wait for some pictures-keeps us going!

Lisa & Dave

Saw this on another blog...had to borrow it....You'll see WHY...

"Sometimes I'd like to ask God why He allows poverty, famine, and injustice in the world when He could do something about it...but I'm afraid God might ask me the same questions".

~Anonymous

Never really thought of it that way...but it made me think of more things I can do to help...I see it as part of pur responsibility...no child or adult should have to live life this way...what can we do to help? Last week we sent formula and this week we sent $$ for a traveling parent to buy more formula to bring with her to Ethiopia. Every little bit helps!

Lisa

25 days....

Less than a month to go until our court date...Woo Hooo!!!! Every little step counts as we get closer to bringing our kids home! We are feeling very optimistic about our court date and being able to bring the kids home very soon.

Still keeping busy...I have been going through pictures lately and trying to organize into albums. I finally realized...no...I won't be able to scrapbook them all (it was all just a dream) so I am working on putting them into albums and then I can scrapbook what I want to. I have so many pictures of the kdis and their friends at the orphanage so am also working on an album that is in consecutive order from when we first started the adoption process. It is kind of sad to look at our first pictures from 11/07 and to see how much the kids have grown in the time frame that we have been waiting-16 months. Danny was a little boy 16 months ago and now he looks like a young man. Yordanos has gotten so tall. While we weren't with them during this time, at least we have pictures. Can't wait to close this part of the journey and begin our family journey!!

Also, just sent some of the donated formula we received with a family that is traveling to Ethiopia on Friday. There is still a major formula shortage so they were happy to take formula to the orphanage.

More later....

Lisa & Dave

36 Days 'Till Court!!!

Yes, 36 days until our court date!! Seems a lot closer now that it is March! We did have some very hopeful news this week. There are 4 families adopting children from the same orphanage as ours. One of the families passed court on Friday and this was the the first try! This is very good news for us because all of our paperwork was done at the same time so hopefully we will sail through on April 6th. We are definitely more hopeful now!

Lisa & Dave